The Brancatelli File
THE GREAT AND POWERFUL
AIRLINES HAVE SPOKEN
BY JOE BRANCATELLI
September 15, 1993 -- Welcome to Oz. This week, the great and powerful airlines have declared a fare war for fall travel.
But business travelers should pay no attention to the man behind the curtain. The wondrous fares he has pulled out of his bag--up to 45 percent off the cost of domestic travel--are available only to leisure travelers.
Business travelers who want to fly this fall are commanded to purchase full-fare tickets. The great and powerful airlines have spoken, and they speak the language of all modern-day wizards: a yellow brick maze of computer-generated restrictions designed to ensure business travelers don't qualify for those wonderful discounts.
Before explaining the dimensions of this week's fare war, it's interesting to take a look at the stakes. For travelers who can meet the restrictions, a roundtrip between Los Angeles and New York can be purchased for as little as $318. A roundtrip to Boston is going for $335. And a flight between Orange County and Detroit costs just $298 roundtrip.
But those are Munchkin prices. Business travelers live in the real world of unrestricted fares. In the real world, the airlines do a damned good imitation of the Wicked Witch of the West.
Say you have to fly to Kansas City on business next month. At the moment, unrestricted roundtrip fares to Kansas City cost at least $638 and as much as $1,050. Chances are you'll be seated next to some vacation traveler named Dorothy. And since Dorothy probably bought her roundtrip ticket during this week's fare war, she'll be flying home to visit Aunty Em for as little as $249!
But you're thinking, "Hey, I got a brain. There must be a way to outwit the great and powerful airlines. Surely I can fly on business for the same price as those leisure travelers."
Sorry to jolt you back to the black and white of the real world, but the great and powerful airlines have "yield management" computers. Yield management is airline jargon for, "Let's make sure business travelers can't get the fares we advertise during the fare wars."
In the case of this week's fare war, the computers have concocted 15 different restrictions that require more than 200 words of explanation.
The first and most important restrictions involve time. This week's discounts are available for travel until December 16, but tickets much be purchased by Friday midnight. Most business travelers don't know where they might have to fly tomorrow, let alone know by Friday where they'll be next week, next month or November or December.
But say you do know where you have to be next Wednesday or--miracle of miracle--that you have figured out you've got to fly to Kansas City on Tuesday, September 28.
Tough break. This week's discounted fares require you to buy tickets at least 14 days in advance. So much for traveling on business in September at a discount.
So let's say you have the courage to reschedule that business trip to Kansas City for next month. Another big restriction: The airlines make the discounted tickets nonrefundable. If your plans change and you no longer need to make that business trip to Kansas City, you've lost the price of the ticket.
The airlines also make sure you won't have too much time to change your mind. Should you choose to book a discounted fare today or tomorrow for business travel next month, you have to buy the ticket within 24 hours or lose the low fare.
Should you be adamant about trying to get one of these discount fares to Kansas City, the airlines have even more annoying restrictions the make your business life miserable. For example, the fares are valid only on the three days business travelers least like to fly: Tuesday, Wednesday and Saturday.
Want to spend the weekend with your family? Then forget about flying to Kansas City on one of this week's discounted fares. The fares also are restricted by the dreaded "Saturday stay" rule. Try to book one of them for a business trip and you'll be required to spend a Saturday night in Kansas City.
By now, you should be ready to give up your quest to buy one this week's discounted fares for a business trip.
And that's the point. The great and powerful airlines have spoken.
BUSINESS TRAVEL NOTES
Hong Kong-based Cathay Pacific once offered the only nonstop flights between Los Angeles and Hong Kong, but United Airlines and Delta Air Lines recently have launched competing service. Cathay has responded with a frequent flyer program promotion: 30,000 miles in American AAdvantage for each roundtrip in first or business-class flown between October 1 and March 31. … British Airways has opened a new arrivals lounge at London's Heathrow Airport for first and business-class passengers and members of BA's frequent flyer program. The lounge offers showers, hot breakfasts, valet services and other amenities. … National Interrent is offering bonus miles in four airline frequent flyer programs until November 30. Weekly rentals earn triple miles and weekend rentals earn double miles in the Continental, Northwest, United and USAir programs. … Carnival Air Lines is scheduled to begin nonstop flights between Los Angeles and Miami on October 2. The service, part of a "code-sharing" arrangement with Iberia Airlines, is timed to connect with the Spanish carrier's flights from Miami to several Latin American business destinations.
This column originally appeared in The Los Angeles Times business section.
Copyright © 1993-2007 by Joe Brancatelli. All rights reserved.